By me, with art by Sam Messerly.
Warbell turned and limped toward me, some vestiges of the flames still smoldering on his shoulders and neck. He shook his head, and the remnants of the fire were tossed up, tracing neon lines in the air.
“Let’s go,” he said.
We found Colander hiding next to the remnants of the truck. She was shaking, incoherent at first, but when she got a good look at me, she gave me a big hug and held on for a long time.
“I was almost splattered across the landscape,” she said. “My gosh. I am really glad you’re still alive.”
I beamed at her through the dirt and scum on my face, and Colander raised grinned hard enough to displace some of the muck on her cheeks.
“Okay, we can’t stay here,” Warbell said. “Hurry. This isn’t going to last. Punkstomper, Wigglejump, and Yellowrdash are going to be out cold for a while with the fires everywhere like this. But there will be more dinosaurs coming. We need to go.”
“Can you even walk?” I asked. “You look terrible.”
“Good,” he said. “I’m a terrible lizard, am I not? I am wounded, but once I can get my cyborg enhancements functioning again, they will streamline the healing process. Come on, I’m going to let you ride. Once in a lifetime experience. Just don’t stick your foot in my wounds. I can still walk faster than you two can run.”
Warbell helped us onto his back, and we were careful not to scramble on the old lizard’s torn skin. I felt incredibly awkward, and with no blanket on his back, I basically had Warbell’s spine digging into my groin. Riding a dinosaur sounds cool, but in this case it really wasn’t—especially given how guilty I felt that I hadn’t had the chance to change my pants. We rode in silence for some time as Warbell took a wide-strolling gait towards Final Pumpkin. He was going quickly, but with care not to accidentally throw us onto the ground and break our necks.
Several minutes passed as I continued holding on to Warbell’s back, my arms threatening to cramp. Suddenly I felt the muscles and flesh under my body subtly shift beneath me. It was like his bones and muscle had reformed to make it easier for us to sit safely on his wide and bumpy dino-back. I also felt a slight buzz in the air, and looked at Colander. She gave me a quizzically curved eyebrow.
“What is that buzzing noise?” Colander asked. “Is that a massage chair inside your butt warming up?”
Warbell smiled.
“Invisibility cloak active,” he said. “We are out of the flames. I am starting to turn on some of the cybernetics again. Some of my interior systems are also active, so I can reshape my body a bit to make the ride slightly safer for you—unless you want for me to let you slide off.”
“Nope, not feeling like sliding right now,” I said, building up a bit of courage to squeak out an attempt at humor. “If you do have any fancy massage settings in your hinder, though, just give me the gentlest setting. I can’t take any more jostling around.”
Frankly, at that point, I felt like I had been jostled around a lot more than just the physical sense, and it was really getting to me. The dirt in my every crevice didn’t help matters any, and given that I wasn’t actively putting myself in imminent danger of becoming saurian foot-sludge anymore, I couldn’t abide the annoyance any longer.
“Something tells me you are still hiding a few things that you didn’t mention in the journal you gave me,” I said.
Warbell grunted, but didn’t proffer anything coherent, so I just went with the wild thought spinning wild through my pain-addled skull.
“Alright,” I said. “So am I right in guessing that big rex is your daughter?”