Category: A Tyrannosaurus on my Doorstep (Normal Version)

Story by Nicholas Driscoll.

Art by Sam Messerly.

Click here to start at the beginning.

The tyrannosaurus led me to my own back yard, talking all the way. The crowd of bystanders began to follow us as well. Everyone was taking pictures, but the tyrannosaurus didn’t seem to mind. In fact, he sometimes put his fingers up in a “peace” sign. Or maybe he was just waving. It’s hard to tell because a tyrannosaurus only has two fingers.

“Look, before we go any further, let’s at least exchange names,” I said. “Unless you just want me to call you ‘Rexy.’ My name is Walter.”

“Come back here, Wal,” said the tyrannosaurus. “Follow me. I think you will find this interesting. You know, I guess maybe you haven’t seen any dinosaurs for a while. And you can call me ‘your majesty.’”

“You are right about not seeing your kind around for awhile, Rexy,” I said. “You are all supposed to be dead.”

“You might think that,” the tyrannosaurus said, noting my insolent remark with a raised eyebrow. “But you would be wrong. Really, did you think we all just died? All of us? I heard people were pretty smart. Maybe it was just a rumor.”

“Don’t tell me there are more of you?” I said.

“There are more of us,” the tyrannosaurus said. “Of course there are. But maybe my friends aren’t going to come out right away. At least, not from your perspective.”

Behind my house was a clearing with a big lawn. Beyond the lawn was a rocky area, with plateaus and cliffs in the distance, most notably a large, towering rock structure relatively close to my property called the Pumpkin Smasher Rock. The Pumpkin Smasher Rock is a tower of stone poised precariously as if it could fall at any moment, though I am told it actually is quite stable.

Anyway, it’s a nice view, which is why I picked this place for my house. Who doesn’t like looking at big, dirty rocks?

We were starting to walk into the boulders and dust and what-not. While the stony structures are pretty in their way, I hadn’t often gone out there due to the possibility that there could be so many big poisonous snakes and spiders. But I had a passing thought that I would rather deal with snakes and spiders than a tyrannosaurus.

“What are we supposed to find out here?” I asked. “A rock with your name on it? Or maybe a 65-million-year-old bill of sale?”

“Kind of like that, Wal,” the tyrannosaurus said. “But it’s not a paper deed. I was actually sleeping out here for a long time. You wouldn’t be able to say my name.”

“You were asleep for 65 million years?” I asked.

“Sixty-five million years, six thousand years, a day—it all feels the same when you’re asleep!” said the tyrannosaurus. “You try counting the years when your sleeping underground! Ah, here we are. Here is where I woke up.”

In the space the dino was indicating, rocks and dirt were broken away and a big hole had been ripped out of the ground. Something had definitely clawed its way out of the ground here. Stones and bits of dirt in all sizes were scattered around the terrain. Some cactuses and plants had been torn up, too.

“You can’t imagine the kind of dreams a fellow has when he sleeps that long,” the tyrannosaurus said.

“A smelly old cave doesn’t prove anything,” I said, and crossed my arms.

“Look beside the cave,” the tyrannosaur said. “I marked this territory as my own many years ago. You can see the proof and I can prove its from me.”

After searching for a few moments, we found what the tyrannosaurus was talking about: a series of huge dinosaur footprints imbedded in the stone. These were very old footprints, but extremely well preserved.

“These footprints are from my time,” said the dinosaur. “And as you can see, they fit my feet perfectly. I was here before you were, I claimed the land myself, I was sleeping on this land and so occupied it all along. You have to admit, this land—actually, this town, come to think of it, is actually mine.”

I almost fainted dead away.

Read the next chapter.

Written by Nicholas Driscoll

Art by Sam Messerly

Read Chapter 1

Chapter 2:

I found my voice after almost a minute.

“You want to live in my garage?” I said. I knew what the tyrannosaurus had said to me. I mean, I understood what he had said perfectly. But I still had to ask the question.

“Yes,” said the tyrannosaurus. “Thank you.”

Suddenly my thoughts cleared and I could talk again.

“Wait, wait, wait,” I stammered, waving my free hand. A strange image of a tyrannosaurus driving my brand-new truck arose in my mind. “You can’t live in my garage!”

“Why not?” said the tyrannosaurus. “I have thought about my problem carefully. I have no house. You have the biggest garage in the area. You have a very big door on your garage. If I duck, I can walk inside. I am sure of it. What is the problem?”

“The problem?” I said. “There are many problems! Not just one! Many!”

“For example?” said the tyrannosaurus. And he took another piece of caramel popcorn and ate it while watching me with one eye.

“My truck and my boat are in there,” I said. “There is no room for you.”

“Easily solved,” the tyrannosaurus said. “Just take the vehicles out. Look, your neighbors have their cars on the street. You can park them there, too. This popcorn is very good.”

And the tyrannosaurus somehow took a handful of popcorn (even though he only has two fingers on each hand). Somehow he managed to get the entire handful into his mouth without dropping one piece.

“I don’t want my vehicles parked on the street!” I said. I was upset. “And I don’t have a tyrannosaurus-sized toilet. I am not lending you my toilet. I don’t do that anymore.”

“I don’t want your toilet,” said the tyrannosaurus. “I can use the yard for that. Don’t worry, I will be discreet. I am a very civil tyrannosaurus.”

The popcorn was almost gone now, and for some reason that made me even more angry.

“No, you can’t!” I said. “I won’t clean up your mess in my lawn. I would need a dump truck. And anyway, most importantly, you can’t stay in my garage for one very important reason!”

The tyrannosaurus cocked his head.

“And what is that reason?” he asked.

The tyrannosaurus finished eating my popcorn with one incredible lick that cleaned out the bowl.

“Stop that!” I said. I got tyrannosaurus saliva on my arm, and it made me very uncomfortable.

By this time, many of the locals had gathered and they were watching us with curiosity. We were starting to make a scene, and I wanted to end this conversation as soon as possible. Like most people, I don’t like talking with unexpected visitors—even when they are extinct super predators.

“You can’t stay in my garage because it is my garage,” I said. “I own it, and I make the final decision. Please go away.”

The tyrannosaurus looked surprised.

“You don’t really have a choice,” the tyrannosaurus said. “After all, this isn’t really your land.”

“Huh?” I said. “What are you talking about?”

“Well,” said the tyrannosaurus lazily. “The garage isn’t really yours. It’s mine. This land is mine, and so your house and your garage are really mine as well. I can prove it to you.”

It was at that moment that I realized this was going to be one of the worst days of my life.

Read the next chapter.

This is chapter one of my dinosaur novel, A Tyrannosaurus on my Doorstep. I wrote this novel back in 2018 and 2019 originally, and have been trying to work out the best way to share it ever since. The novel has 98 short chapters, and I am hoping to post them here for free for anyone to read–and I hope to enjoy! Each chapter also has an accompanying illustration done by my friend Sam Messerly, and you can find much more of his work here. I am hoping to publish a couple chapters each week in two forms–one with just the chapter and art, but another with additional material designed to help Japanese readers of English study. My initial purpose for writing the book was that it could serve as enjoyable reading material for English learners in Japan, and I used the book in two of my reading classes years ago–to mostly positive results. Now I would like to make the novel available for any readers and teachers who might like to use it in their classes or for their own study–or just to enjoy. Thank you, and I hope you like the story!

Chapter 1

One day I found a tyrannosaurus on my doorstep. I was very surprised. He knocked on my door when I was eating popcorn and watching a movie in my living room. I don’t remember the movie. You forget things like movies when you find a tyrannosaurus on your doorstep. Anyway, the knock was very quiet. I did not know a tyrannosaurus could knock on a door very quietly. Now I know. Be careful if you hear a quiet knock on your door.

I flopped around looking for my remote and almost knocked over a pile of broken cell phones I needed to fix yet.

After pausing my movie (Death Dancers and the Swing Thing—it’s really good if you haven’t seen it), I walked to my front door. I thought maybe it was my neighbor, Charlie. Charlie always wanted to borrow something from me. For example, one day he borrowed my truck. Another day he borrowed my best hat. Another day he borrowed my toilet. I mean he actually took my toilet to his house. “I will give it back to you tomorrow,” he said.

He still has my toilet.

I hate Charlie.

So, I opened the door. I expected to see Charlie. Instead, I saw two trees in my front lawn I had never seen before. I was surprised. I don’t expect to see new trees in my front lawn. I think it is very rare for a tree to visit your house. Have you ever seen a tree visit your front lawn? Of course not.

And then the trees moved. And I noticed that the trees were wearing pants.

And then I saw the trees were not trees. They were legs. And the legs belonged to a brown tyrannosaurus with slashes of bright orange. And the tyrannosaurus smiled at me.

“Hello,” the tyrannosaurus said. “I am a tyrannosaurus, and I am interested in your garage.”

I was very surprised. Have you ever been very surprised? I mean, very, very surprised. I could not move. I could not run. I could not speak. I think my face looked very funny because the tyrannosaurus’ smile became much bigger.

“Don’t worry,” the tyrannosaurus said. “I won’t eat you. Look at my teeth.”

I looked at his teeth. They were not sharp teeth. He had very big, very white, very… friendly teeth. Can teeth be friendly? His were beautiful, friendly teeth. I think a person could sell toothpaste with such beautiful teeth. I saw my face reflected in his two giant molars. I noticed I was scared out of my mind.

“I am sorry,” I said finally. “Do you want some popcorn?”

I didn’t know what to say. You try talking to a tyrannosaurus sometime. Probably you won’t know what to say either. Also, I was still holding a big bowl of popcorn. From that movie I was watching. I thought maybe it was rude if I did not offer the tyrannosaurus some popcorn.

It was caramel popcorn, in case you were wondering. Probably bad for a tyrannosaurus’ teeth. Which means probably they are bad for my teeth, too. And I wondered how much popcorn a tyrannosaurus could eat. I realized that I think about stupid things when I see a tyrannosaurus on my doorstep.

“That is very kind of you,” the tyrannosaurus said. He took one piece of popcorn between two fingers and tossed it into his mouth.

“Delicious, really,” the tyrannosaurus said. “But I am not here for your popcorn.”

The tyrannosaurus moved closer, and I almost dropped my bowl of popcorn.

“I want to live in your garage,” said the tyrannosaurus.

Read the next chapter.